I don't know how to tell you all just how crazy this life feels

Archive for July, 2013

22 months, 22 days

I seem to have forgotten totally about my blog. I didn’t even have it open in a tab anymore, and I can’t recall when I would have closed it. I guess sometime in the last 22 days since I posted not that long ago.

I think we may have hit the terrible twos but I’m not sure. The past few days he’s been throwing tantrums and having huge meltdowns, sometimes over things I can figure out and sometimes seemingly over nothing.

Yesterday he threw his first on-the-floor tantrum and I have no clue what the trigger was. I left him laying on the floor and waited until he was ready to come see me, which he did after a few minutes. I asked if he wanted a hug, he said yes but continued to cry afterwards. The only thing I could get out of him was that he wanted a hug and he wanted Mommy and Daddy, everything else I asked him (snack? did he hurt himself? did he want to go outside?) he said no to. Then he pointed to the backyard so we went outside and sat on the swing where he threw another fit. I hugged and held him and then he fell asleep for an hour.

He’s been waking up at 6:30 (or earlier some days) so he’s getting less sleep overall, probably for the past week or two. I’m not sure why, but I’m wondering if the less sleep is catching up to him. I feel like a lot of the tantrums and fights are less about not being able to do what he wants (which I can deal with) and more about being tired. I guess I’ll see how it continues and maybe I’ll have to reinstitute naptime if he seems to need it again, though the only way he’ll nap is on me and only when he’s really hit the wall, which is a point I do not like to get to.

He hit me a couple of days in a row out of frustration. I got up and walked away, saying “you’re not allowed to hit people” and he screamed and cried and was upset. Then after a minute I went back and asked if he was ready to apologize and he said yes and we hugged and I said something about how I understand him being frustrated, but hitting isn’t allowed. And then we moved on and everything was fine. The first time he sobbed for a long time after, but the second time he recovered more quickly. I’m hoping since he reacts so strongly to me walking away that it’ll sink in faster, but I guess it depends on whether he’s capable of thinking before he acts or not yet.

I left this and it’s now the next day, I think. I think I was writing this yesterday. Unless it was two days ago. Anyway, I’ll just continue.

Yesterday we took FrostedBaby to a Provincial Park that’s about an hour from here and went swimming in the lake. He’s so funny when he gets in the water because all of a sudden he’s no longer a cautious kid, he suddenly gets all brave and wants to run and jump and chase after his ball. We got him one of those float aids that has the lifejacket foamy stuff part on the front and inflatable water wings attached to it so it helps keep him upright and makes him fall a bit slower if he loses his balance and his head doesn’t go under. It means he’s easier to hang onto if we’re swimming with him, but also that we can let him go and he can move by himself and we just need to stay nearby, ready to grab him. At first I was really nervous about letting him go but then he and I both got used to how he would fall with the floaty vest thing and he wouldn’t go under quite as dramatically and I wasn’t grabbing him at every wobble. We were hoping to rent a paddle boat but the lineup was too long and it was too close to lunch time and we had to leave early, so hopefully next time it’ll work out. It was a great day and I’m looking forward to two weekends from now when Husband is on his annual guys’ camping trip and we’re actually allowed to come up and visit this year.

Still trying to figure out the whole sleeping enough thing. He fell asleep in the car on the way home yesterday so went to bed later again and woke up at 6:13, which was 11 hours of sleep or so. He was tired this afternoon but I kept him up since we had company and he wouldn’t settle on me for a nap, so he went to bed early. If he sleeps until 6:30, let’s say, that would be 13 hours and hopefully will be less tired tomorrow. I’m hoping he doesn’t wake up after 12 hours because that would be like 5:30am and no way am I getting up at that time for no reason 😛

Speaking of which, I’m going to go to bed. I keep saying I’m going to go early and then I never do, but after several days of getting up early and even more days than that not sleeping well or just getting to bed late, I’m making myself get to bed early tonight. There was other stuff I was going to write about but right now I can’t think of what it was.