I don't know how to tell you all just how crazy this life feels

19 months tomorrow

We are still alive. I keep wanting to update and I just seem to have no time. Or when I do have time, I’m so exhausted I don’t want to think too hard. It’s been over a month since I posted, and even longer since I posted anything of substance.

We’re going through a separation anxiety phase which is exhausting. He was sick and sleeping with me and since then he’s been very hit and miss on the sleeping alone. Sometimes I can get him back down in his crib, sometimes I can’t, sometimes I don’t even try since I’m more interested in getting everyone back in bed and asleep as quickly as possible since he’s waking up earlier in the morning. In the past two weeks (or is it three? I think it’s only two) there has only been one night where he’s slept the whole night in his own bed without waking up and/or coming into my bed. Well, that night he woke up at 6 and I brought him into bed and we went back to sleep for another while.

I was feeling pretty down on myself because I feel like bringing him into bed with me is not a great solution, especially since he’s at the age where he can start manipulating and stuff, but letting him cry is not a good option because he gets hysterical really fast and that just makes everything worse, and getting him back down in his own bed is often really difficult (or impossible and wastes hours when we could have been sleeping) and then no one sleeps. It just seems like there are no good solutions and I’m terrified that some of it is me being too soft on him or something. Then my friend whose son is two days younger than FrostedBaby said her son is doing the same thing and he’s not at all sensitive or a mommy’s boy at all, so it’s probably the age. Separation anxiety peaks at around 18 months. I remember reading that when he was going through it at 12 months or whenever it was and thinking “great, another 6 months of this”. Well, now I read that it should be totally gone by 3 years old. Why do they keep moving the age when it will for sure be over every time I look it up?!

Anyway, so it’s been tough lately. I think his SA during the day has been better lately, so I’m hoping the nighttime will follow and I got a new carrier that’s really comfortable and I can put him in it if he’s being super clingy while I’m making dinner or needing to get things done and he loves it and quiets down right away.

I want to write about other stuff, but I’m heading to bed. We have a doctor’s appointment in the morning to follow up after a course of antibiotics he was on for a chest infection. I made it for 9am because I wasn’t thinking and we were there for the walk-in hour of 8-9am when I made it, but that was because I just got him up and took his temperature and he still had a fever (the 4th day in a row) and I just packed us up and went over. Now he’s eating normally and all so it won’t be quite so easy. Oh well, we’ll work it out. At least if he’s eating breakfast in the waiting room it’ll keep him occupied, and hopefully we won’t be waiting and it won’t take too long.

Hopefully I’ll be posting with a more in depth update soon!


Comments on: "19 months tomorrow" (2)

  1. Sorry to hear about the SA struggles. A friend of mine had similar issues with her daughter. It was a struggle but eventually she grew out of it.

  2. The awful thing about phases is that you never know if it’s a phase that they’ll move out of naturally (and you’re never sure how long it’ll last) or something you really need to correct and all the second guessing is stressful on top of it just being an exhausting time. Hopefully we are on the way out of it.

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