I don't know how to tell you all just how crazy this life feels


Holy crap. Day before yesterday was July 20th. I am due August 20th. Someone told me that the third trimester went by really slowly, but I find it’s just flying by and I can’t believe it’s already two thirds gone by.

This week I have been quite sore and tired. My groin has been hurting a fair bit, though it’s mostly when I first get up and then it loosens up a bit. My back hurts when I lean over too much, and it’s often up higher on my back, not just my lower, which is sort of weird. I’m really used to low back soreness since I have it even without being pregnant, but the upper is different. I have lots of cervix pressure and stabs of pain, which I’m guessing are mostly him headbutting me or moving in that area. I have some stabbing pains higher up than my cervix that I assume is also him moving. I often feel him pushing up top and down low at the same time, which is new over the past week or so, now that he’s big enough. I used to occasionally get it but it was more kicks at that point, not the steady pressure that I get now when he’s stretching out. My mom said I used to stretch out a lot too, so I guess this is payback for that šŸ˜‰

More of his movements are painful or uncomfortable, mostly when he’s right in my ribs or if he’s sticking sharp parts into me. On Tuesday I think it was he had his toes or heels or something pressed into me constantly, which got sore after a while, and then to make things worse he’d then push up in the same spot with the same sharp and pointy thing. That was fun.

Up until now I haven’t really been able to identify many body parts aside from his bum (which was confirmed by the ultrasound) and I could tell when it was his feet kicking me, but that was mostly because it wasn’t his bum and what else would it be right there? Yesterday I very distinctly felt a heel in my ribs. Don’t ask me how I know because I’m not even sure, but it was most definitely his heel.

Sitting is more difficult because it feels like he’s more often than not right under my ribs, which means I can’t bend forward even more than before, which is not much. BH are more intense, though there are still some that I don’t feel much. I get these menstrual-like cramps down low sometimes that come and go, probably something to do with ligaments stretching or baby moving or something.

We did our maternity pictures on Tuesday with the photographer from our wedding. She was a lot of fun, as she was at the wedding. She had a baby boy in January; he’s super cute. We went down to a lakefront part at the end of her street and walked around a bunch and did a bunch of different pictures. I can’t wait to see them — if even half of them are as good as our wedding pictures, we won’t be disappointed. The biggest problem with getting them is that from straight-on, it’s not very obvious that I’m pregnant. From the side, totally obvious. But my belly is so straight out and round and compact that it doesn’t look like much if you’re not looking at me from an angle. I guess it’s not really helped that I haven’t put on weight anywhere else, although then maybe I’d just end up looking fat. If I don’t already šŸ˜‰

She seemed impressed that I was able to walk around the whole park without resting (well, except for all the pictures) and I was able to get down to the ground and up again with minimal assistance. Meanwhile I feel like I’m the least agile and flexible person in the world and she’s calling me YogaMom. Apparently during the last part of her pregnancy she couldn’t even walk down the street, let alone all over a park, so I guess it’s mostly relative. I notice my lack of flexibility and agility because I’m so used to having it. I get comments at work about my walking fast or “running”, but I thought they were just slowpokes because I feel soooooo sloooooow, but maybe I am still pretty quick comparatively. It also does depend a bit on how my groin is feeling at the time though šŸ˜‰

Saw my MW on Wednesday and did that GBS testing (swabbing vagina, perineum, and rectum for certain bacteria). I was afraid of having to do it since I can’t exactly see down there anymore and thought I’d have to be exact where I put the swab, but she assured me that the more things I touch, the better since they really want to know if you carry this bacteria so they can give you the antibiotics accordingly. My fundus is measuring a week behind still, but since the u/s came back okay, I’m not too concerned. It’s still going up at a steady pace and it wasn’t a problem with the other MWs so maybe she’s just a weird measurer or something. I’ve seen her for the last three or four appointments, so if it’s a thing with her measuring, I wouldn’t necessarily know unless I saw someone else who got a higher number.

Also on Wednesday, we got together with the friend who’s given us all the clothes and she gave us her old infant car seat that her son just outgrew. We have one from other friends as well, but were also offered this one, so we figured we might put one in each car and then just coordinate which seat to take depending on the car or buy a second base if we ended up liking one better, whatever. When we got home, we compared them… and it turns out they’re the same seat, just different colours! Which means we have two bases now. And we can either use one or the other, or else switch back and forth, or when he gets a bit bigger and maybe we don’t want to take the seats out of the car anymore, we can just have one in each car and not have to constantly move things around. Score!

The hospital told us that if we go to the Fire Department, they’ll help us install or at least inspect our installation and give us a sticker of approval and then they won’t bug us when we want to go home. I phoned the local FD and they don’t do that anymore. At my MW appointment, a girl was there with her 13 day old baby (oh my god! So small!) and she was giving me some random advice, and then when we were both leaving she saw I didn’t have a car seat in my car yet, she said I should do it soon and that the Police Department in Scarborough (she cited a division number) would do it. So I phoned them, and they don’t do it anymore either. When did this change? Like last month? I wonder if she attended a clinic or something. There are some in our area, but we’ve missed the ones for July and the ones in August aren’t for another few weeks, which I feel is too late to leave it to, though we could sign up and go whether we’ve had the baby yet or not. I know installing it isn’t hard, but when you hear that so many people do it wrong, I just want to know that someone who knows what they’re doing have looked at it.

I think I said it or something similar before, but I feel like I might be on the brink of the “okay, baby can come any time now” feeling. I keep forgetting that my belly is so big and I keep hitting things with it, which hurts because it’s always the very end and my belly button is sensitive and sore. When I lay down I feel like a beached whale (I’m officially there!) and having to move around is quite difficult. During our pictures, any time we had to get down on the ground, I made my husband get down first and then she would move him around to get the best light and then I would get down so I didn’t have to shift around as much. It was hard enough not squishing my poor belly without having to also move around šŸ˜› I’m starting to think more about how nice it’ll be to be getting back to normal – to sleeping on my back, to being able to roll over without moaning and groaning, to getting up and down more easily, to being more flexible, to having room for food and poop!

I think once I hit 37 weeks that feeling will solidify too because then at least he’ll be full term and it won’t be a bad thing to go into labour. I’d like him to hang on until I’ve had some time off preferably though.

I definitely feel very differently about the idea of having a baby than I did even a few weeks ago. There’s definitely a lot more excitement, even about actual labour (although with some nervousness and worry), and I can’t wait to see what he looks like and find out who he takes after and all that. It’s like I’m getting ready to be ready to leave this phase and move onto the next one with less sadness about that than I would have had not too long ago. There will be lots of stuff I will miss, but I feel more ready for the next thing now.

How crazy hot is it today? My car was reading 41 at one point. It was 26 when I left the house before 7:30 and was 31 by 8:00. I’m not sure if we officially beat the heat record of hottest ever in TO, but we did beat the warmest low temperature of the day, with 26 at 6am or something like that. Thank goodness for having a/c at home, in my car, and at work. My husband’s car’s a/c broke a few months ago and we haven’t gotten it fixed because it’s so expensive and because it hasn’t been that hot. He had plans to go shopping with a friend to pick up stuff for their camping this weekend and I told him to wait until I got home and then he could take my car. I just think it’s dangerous to drive for any length of time without a/c, especially when you’re hot like my husband is to begin with.

I’ve actually been okay in the heat — as a cold person, I think my body temperature might be hovering around normal person territory, which means I’m hot when it’s hot, but I’m not overly hot the rest of the time (unless I’m having hot flashes, though those have been minimal, knock on wood) so unlike a lot of pregnant women, I’m not starting off boiling hot. I’m also okay with the a/c being lower and actually find a lot of places too cold still. Yay for being a cold person!


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